Wednesday, March 28, 2007

On Self-Help Seminars

Last night my wife and I attended a "sampler" as it were, of an ongoing self-help seminar spearheaded by some Fil-Am who has apparently dazzled a lot of people with his words of wisdom. Our experience at the sampler consisted principally of former participants of the seminar sharing their experiences and attesting to how they had benefited from the seminar. Some ofthe guests shared some of their frustrations, and I even got a crack at the mike to talk about some of the things I'd like to do with my life which I haven't gotten around to doing. It's not that I really wanted the help; I just like to talk, really.

I found myself struck by the seminar, which is a lot like the seminar Greg Kinnear's character in the film Little Miss Sunshine was trying so hard to push. I was struck by how shrewd its organizers were, basically catering to people with specific insecurities, the most conspicuous of whom seemed to be the ones with relationship problems. I was, during the break (during which Theia and I sneaked out) even approached by a strikingly beautiful facilitator who asked me if I planned to register to which I politely said no. I marvelled at how clever they were; what better way to attract a young man into their seminar than by having a very attractive young woman make the spiel?

I'm not really going to dump on the seminar (thought at P19,000 for four freaking days it is definitely pricey; my Mandatory Continuing Legal Education didn't cost nearly as much) because from what I saw in that room there was definitely a market for it.

What strikes me is how, even in a country such as the Philippines which puts a high premium on family values, there are apparently quite a few people who have managed to alienate themselves from their respective communities and families.

I've never been a particularly outgoing guy, but when I form friendships and other relationships I value I make an effort to nurture them. It's not something I always knew how to do, but I learned it over time and am still learning it. And I certainly didn't need someone else to teach me how to do it. How far gone, then are some people, that they would need someone to tell them how to talk to their family, or something like that?

Is this a signal of the inevitably decay in society? Is this "me" culture which has so many people present at that seminar feeling lost a product of too much Westernization? I really don't know, and it sounds like something that should be viewed a little more scientifically. Whatever it is, I honestly think it's sad that, rather than seek the aid from one's own community, be it from the parish priest or one's extended family or network of friends, there are people willing to shell out large amounts of money just to learn how to relate to others.



2 comments:

Ryan said...

self help seminar???? i can't believe you even bothered to go into one

Jim Arroyo said...

Well, it was Theia's idea (always the married man's refuge), but on top of that, she never really went into the specifics of what we were attending before we actually went. Anyway, we only stayed about an hour and that was only because I would have felt bad about leaving so soon after driving all the way to Makati to go there :p